If it seems like I, for instance, haven’t posted a blog post in several days, it is in fact because I haven’t posted a blog post in several days. The reason for this is that my laptop broke.
On Friday I attended a party and I brought my laptop with me (as requested, because it was a nerd party and therefor socially appropriate). The screen that greeted me upon opening, however, resembled the Enterprise consoles when they are malfunctioning. There were difficult to grasp words like “boot” and “LAN”, and wiggling the mouse furiously did absolutely nothing for me.
Naturally, my friend Paul fixed it in thirty seconds. But when the problem reappeared the next day, I brought it into the only computer repair place within thirty miles, which happened to be the glamorous Geek Squad of Best Buy. You take what you can get.
I left my darling HAL 9000 there with them for a few days, over which time they called again and again to inform me of the various terrible illnesses my computer was facing. And as they described what needed to be fixed, and as the numbers climbed higher, I started to wonder if it really needed to fix it at all. It had been haphazardly backed up only a few days prior, and it was a little over three years old (around 74 in computer years).
Gee, I could pay a lot of money to help it limp its way through a few more years, or I could abandon it now and save a lot of hassle. With this mindset, I apologize to my parents for the quality of the nursing home they’ll find themselves in in twenty years.
It had lived a good long life, and frankly I wasn’t keen on paying a ludicrous sum of money to repair something that wouldn’t be able to handle programs coming out in 2018. So instead of having it repaired, I quietly abandoned it in favor of purchasing an entirely new model as a birthday gift to me.
Meet the DELL Inspironion 73898 Something. I don’t know. It had good reviews and it plays Fallout 4, what more could you want?
The new computer has its problems, of course. I have to completely reinstall a lot of my games, the keyboard is making me type with two fingers like someone who only has two fingers, and I’m fairly certain Cortana actually owns my soul at this point. But it’s not a bad machine, and I can’t wait to troubleshoot in a completely new operating system.
Paul can have my old computer so that he can magically get it working again with a hand gesture and a few ancient incantations.